Wednesday, February 22, 2012
You Came To The Right Place.
Scroll down and below you can find a list of pick up lines I've compiled for your viewing pleasure. Yes, these pick up lines work. Here's a video of us testing them out in public.
Dirty Pick Up Lines
• I heard your ankles were having a party, want to invite your pants on down?
• What do you say we make like Winnie-the-poo and I can get my nose stuck in
your honey jar?
• Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?
• My name's Pogo, d'ya wanna jump on my stick?
• Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to
introduce myself.
• Did you know there are 260 bones in the human body? Want one more?
• Why don't you come sit on my lap and we can talk about the first thing that
pops up?
• Can I put my magic wand in your Harry Potter?
• I think that we might be related. Let me check for the family birthmark on
your chest.
• What’s a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
• I don't know much about pies but damn you make my banana cream.
• My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in.
• Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
• Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight.
• Where you born on a farm? Cause you sure know how to raise a cock!
• Will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into that cheap motel.
• You're like a prize winning fish. I dont know whether to eat you or mount
you.
• I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!
your honey jar?
• Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?
• My name's Pogo, d'ya wanna jump on my stick?
• Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to
introduce myself.
• Did you know there are 260 bones in the human body? Want one more?
• Why don't you come sit on my lap and we can talk about the first thing that
pops up?
• Can I put my magic wand in your Harry Potter?
• I think that we might be related. Let me check for the family birthmark on
your chest.
• What’s a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
• I don't know much about pies but damn you make my banana cream.
• My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in.
• Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
• Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight.
• Where you born on a farm? Cause you sure know how to raise a cock!
• Will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into that cheap motel.
• You're like a prize winning fish. I dont know whether to eat you or mount
you.
• I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!
More Dirty Pick Up Lines
• Is your dad a farmer? Because you’ve got some melons.
• I lost my rubber ducky, will you bathe with me instead?
• I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me tonight?
• You’ve got a butt that makes me want to be your wallet!
• Girl, you’re a sex crime waiting to happen.
• Do you like magic? I want to cast a spell on you with my magic meat wand.
• Do you know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?
Wanna find out?
• I'm an army recruiter. Why don't you come over to my place and "be all you
can be."
• Wanna see a trick I learned in prison?
• Girl, I would love to lick your belly button......from the inside!
• My bed is broken. Can I sleep in yours?
• They call me "coffee". I grind so fine.
• Do you like whales? Cause I have a hump-back at my place.
• That's a nice shirt, it would go great with my floor.
• You must be Jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.
• Don't worry, I don't get emotionally involved. It's just physical.
• I'll make you shiver when I deliver.
• Do you like blueberries or strawberries? (Why?) I want to know what kind of
pancakes to order in the morning.
• Wanna play midget boxing? You get down on your knees and give me a couple
blows!
• I lost my rubber ducky, will you bathe with me instead?
• I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me tonight?
• You’ve got a butt that makes me want to be your wallet!
• Girl, you’re a sex crime waiting to happen.
• Do you like magic? I want to cast a spell on you with my magic meat wand.
• Do you know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?
Wanna find out?
• I'm an army recruiter. Why don't you come over to my place and "be all you
can be."
• Wanna see a trick I learned in prison?
• Girl, I would love to lick your belly button......from the inside!
• My bed is broken. Can I sleep in yours?
• They call me "coffee". I grind so fine.
• Do you like whales? Cause I have a hump-back at my place.
• That's a nice shirt, it would go great with my floor.
• You must be Jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.
• Don't worry, I don't get emotionally involved. It's just physical.
• I'll make you shiver when I deliver.
• Do you like blueberries or strawberries? (Why?) I want to know what kind of
pancakes to order in the morning.
• Wanna play midget boxing? You get down on your knees and give me a couple
blows!
Some More Dirty Pick Up Lines
• If women were trophies, you’d be first place.
• If women were trophies, I’d mount you.
• I may not be the Dairy Queen, but I could treat you right.
• I’ve got skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?
• My magic watch says that you aren’t wearing any underwear. (What! Yes I
am!) Dang, it must be 15 minutes fast!
• I have a snake and he wants to enter your garden.
• If I was an astronaut, my next mission would be Uranus.
• Let’s have breakfast tomorrow. Should I call you or nudge you?
• You turn my software into hardware.
• You turn my floppy disk into a hard drive.
• Do you believe in one night stands?
• Hey baby, if I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
• I’m a bird watcher and I’m looking for the Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have
you seen one?
• Nice legs, let’s eat out.
• Excuse me miss, I was wondering… Do you wipe front to back or back to front?
• Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants!
• Are you a horse? (No.) Can I ride you anyway?
• Your face or mine?
• I’m bigger and better than the titanic… Only 200 women went down on the
titanic.
• Is your dad a farmer? Because you’re making my corn grow.
• If women were trophies, I’d mount you.
• I may not be the Dairy Queen, but I could treat you right.
• I’ve got skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?
• My magic watch says that you aren’t wearing any underwear. (What! Yes I
am!) Dang, it must be 15 minutes fast!
• I have a snake and he wants to enter your garden.
• If I was an astronaut, my next mission would be Uranus.
• Let’s have breakfast tomorrow. Should I call you or nudge you?
• You turn my software into hardware.
• You turn my floppy disk into a hard drive.
• Do you believe in one night stands?
• Hey baby, if I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
• I’m a bird watcher and I’m looking for the Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have
you seen one?
• Nice legs, let’s eat out.
• Excuse me miss, I was wondering… Do you wipe front to back or back to front?
• Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants!
• Are you a horse? (No.) Can I ride you anyway?
• Your face or mine?
• I’m bigger and better than the titanic… Only 200 women went down on the
titanic.
• Is your dad a farmer? Because you’re making my corn grow.
Even More Dirty Pick Up Lines
• What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.
• Do you work for UPS? I could’ve sworn I saw you checking out my package.
• Do you work for cingular, cause your raising my bar!
• You must be an army general, because my private just snapped into attention.
• Your body is like an hour glass, and I just want to play in the sand.
• Did you fart? Cause you blow me away.
• I’m gay, think you can convert me?
• I’ll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast.
• I’ll show you my tan lines if you show me yours.
• I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.
• If you were homework I would do you on the table.
• If a fat man kidnaps you and puts you in a bag at night, don’t worry I told
Santa I wanted you for Christmas.
• Is your father a lumberjack? Because every time I look at you I get wood in
my pants.
• Your eyes are almost as blue as my toilet water.
• You’re so hot you would make the devil sweat.
• Girl you’re like an accident… I just can’t look away.
• Violets are blue, roses are red. What’s it going to take to get you in bed?
• Is your shirt felt? Do you want it to be?
• Do you work at Subway? Cause you just gave me a foot long!
• I’ve been wondering, do your lips taste as good as they look?
• Do you work for UPS? I could’ve sworn I saw you checking out my package.
• Do you work for cingular, cause your raising my bar!
• You must be an army general, because my private just snapped into attention.
• Your body is like an hour glass, and I just want to play in the sand.
• Did you fart? Cause you blow me away.
• I’m gay, think you can convert me?
• I’ll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast.
• I’ll show you my tan lines if you show me yours.
• I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.
• If you were homework I would do you on the table.
• If a fat man kidnaps you and puts you in a bag at night, don’t worry I told
Santa I wanted you for Christmas.
• Is your father a lumberjack? Because every time I look at you I get wood in
my pants.
• Your eyes are almost as blue as my toilet water.
• You’re so hot you would make the devil sweat.
• Girl you’re like an accident… I just can’t look away.
• Violets are blue, roses are red. What’s it going to take to get you in bed?
• Is your shirt felt? Do you want it to be?
• Do you work at Subway? Cause you just gave me a foot long!
• I’ve been wondering, do your lips taste as good as they look?
Cheesy Pick Up Lines
• Nike took my motto- Just Do It.
• This isn't a beer belly, It'a a fuel tank for a love machine.
• There are a lot of fish in the sea, but you're the only one I'd like to
mount.
• Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull pockets out) Would you
like to?
• Did you know kissing is a language of love? How about a conversation?
• I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Wal-Mart, so I could ride you all day
long for a quarter.
• Bond. James Bond.
• How was heaven when you left it?
• I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.
• Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel?
• You look like an angel. Welcome to Earth.
• Pinch me. (Why?) You're so fine I must be dreaming.
• Your daddy must be a hunter because he sure caught a fox!
• You must be from Pearl Harbor, because baby, you're the bomb.
• Are you snickers? Because you satisfy me.
• Excuse me, I have an boo boo on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?
• Can I take your picture? (Why?) Because I want Santa to know exactly what I
want for Christmas.
• I'm a Love Pirate, and I'm here for your booty!
• Hey baby. You got a jersey? (What for?) Because I need your name and number,
baby.
• This isn't a beer belly, It'a a fuel tank for a love machine.
• There are a lot of fish in the sea, but you're the only one I'd like to
mount.
• Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull pockets out) Would you
like to?
• Did you know kissing is a language of love? How about a conversation?
• I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Wal-Mart, so I could ride you all day
long for a quarter.
• Bond. James Bond.
• How was heaven when you left it?
• I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.
• Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel?
• You look like an angel. Welcome to Earth.
• Pinch me. (Why?) You're so fine I must be dreaming.
• Your daddy must be a hunter because he sure caught a fox!
• You must be from Pearl Harbor, because baby, you're the bomb.
• Are you snickers? Because you satisfy me.
• Excuse me, I have an boo boo on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?
• Can I take your picture? (Why?) Because I want Santa to know exactly what I
want for Christmas.
• I'm a Love Pirate, and I'm here for your booty!
• Hey baby. You got a jersey? (What for?) Because I need your name and number,
baby.
More Cheesy Pick Up Lines
• Is your dad a baker? Cause those buns are kickin!
• See my friend over there? He wanted me to ask you if you thought I was cute.
• Did the sun just come up or was that just you smiling at me?
• Somebody call the cops, it must be illegal to look that good!
• Do you know CPR? Cause you just took my breath away.
• Is your dad a baker? Cause you’re a cutie pie!
• Is your last name Campbell? Cause you’re mmm mmm good!
• Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
• (Use thumb to smudge a girl’s cheek) You got a little beautiful on your face.
• Are you a hurricane? Cause you blow me away.
• I must be in heaven because I’m looking at an angel.
• People call me (your name), but you can call me tonight!
• I noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you the notice that I’ve
noticed you too.
• Miss, I’m going to have to report you for stealing that. (What?) My heart.
• So… Do you have a New Year’s Resolution? I’m looking at mine right now.
• Dang, there’s something wrong with my cell phone. (What?) Your number’s not
in it.
• Are you a cop? (No.) Cause your America’s finest.
• Hey there, I didn’t know angels flew so low.
• You must be Jamaican, because your Jamaican me crazy!
• Are you a pokemon? Cause I’d sure like to Pikachu!
• If you were a pokemon, I’d choose you!
• See my friend over there? He wanted me to ask you if you thought I was cute.
• Did the sun just come up or was that just you smiling at me?
• Somebody call the cops, it must be illegal to look that good!
• Do you know CPR? Cause you just took my breath away.
• Is your dad a baker? Cause you’re a cutie pie!
• Is your last name Campbell? Cause you’re mmm mmm good!
• Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?
• (Use thumb to smudge a girl’s cheek) You got a little beautiful on your face.
• Are you a hurricane? Cause you blow me away.
• I must be in heaven because I’m looking at an angel.
• People call me (your name), but you can call me tonight!
• I noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you the notice that I’ve
noticed you too.
• Miss, I’m going to have to report you for stealing that. (What?) My heart.
• So… Do you have a New Year’s Resolution? I’m looking at mine right now.
• Dang, there’s something wrong with my cell phone. (What?) Your number’s not
in it.
• Are you a cop? (No.) Cause your America’s finest.
• Hey there, I didn’t know angels flew so low.
• You must be Jamaican, because your Jamaican me crazy!
• Are you a pokemon? Cause I’d sure like to Pikachu!
• If you were a pokemon, I’d choose you!
Some More Cheesy Pick Up Lines
• Do you know karate? Cause that body is kickin!
• If being beautiful was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged.
• Are you a parking ticket? Cause you’ve got FINE written all over you!
• Has your license been suspended for driving all these men crazy?
• Did you have lucky charms this morning? Cause your looking magically delicious!
• If you were a burger at McDonalds, you’d definitely be McGorgeous.
• Mmm girl, I wish I was a farmer so I could just plant a whole field of yall!
• Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?
• If you were a booger, I’d pick you first.
• Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven.
• Do you have the time? To write down my number.
• I was blinded by your beauty and am going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
• Can I take a picture of you? So I can show Santa what I want for Christmas.
• Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only ten I see!
• Are you an alien? Because you’ve just abducted my heart.
• Are you an alien? Because there’s nothing else like you on Earth!
• Do you have any raisins? How about a date?
• Do you have a band aid on you? Cause I just scraped my knee falling for you.
• Dang, you’re so beautiful I forgot my pick up line.
• If I had a nickel for every time I saw a girl as beautiful for you, I’d have five cents.
• If being beautiful was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged.
• Are you a parking ticket? Cause you’ve got FINE written all over you!
• Has your license been suspended for driving all these men crazy?
• Did you have lucky charms this morning? Cause your looking magically delicious!
• If you were a burger at McDonalds, you’d definitely be McGorgeous.
• Mmm girl, I wish I was a farmer so I could just plant a whole field of yall!
• Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?
• If you were a booger, I’d pick you first.
• Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven.
• Do you have the time? To write down my number.
• I was blinded by your beauty and am going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.
• Can I take a picture of you? So I can show Santa what I want for Christmas.
• Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only ten I see!
• Are you an alien? Because you’ve just abducted my heart.
• Are you an alien? Because there’s nothing else like you on Earth!
• Do you have any raisins? How about a date?
• Do you have a band aid on you? Cause I just scraped my knee falling for you.
• Dang, you’re so beautiful I forgot my pick up line.
• If I had a nickel for every time I saw a girl as beautiful for you, I’d have five cents.
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