Wednesday, February 22, 2012

You Came To The Right Place.

Scroll down and below you can find a list of pick up lines I've compiled for your viewing pleasure. Yes, these pick up lines work. Here's a video of us testing them out in public.

Dirty Pick Up Lines

• I heard your ankles were having a party, want to invite your pants on down?

• What do I have to do to be your booty call?

• What do you say we make like Winnie-the-poo and I can get my nose stuck in
your honey jar?

• Nice pants. Can I test the zipper?

• My name's Pogo, d'ya wanna jump on my stick?

• Excuse me, miss, do you give head to strangers? No. Well, then, allow me to
introduce myself.

• Did you know there are 260 bones in the human body? Want one more?

• Why don't you come sit on my lap and we can talk about the first thing that
pops up?

• Can I put my magic wand in your Harry Potter?

• I think that we might be related. Let me check for the family birthmark on
your chest.

• What’s a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?

• I don't know much about pies but damn you make my banana cream.

• My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can’t hold it in.

• Save a horse, ride a cowboy.

• Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight.

• Where you born on a farm? Cause you sure know how to raise a cock!

• Will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into that cheap motel.

• You're like a prize winning fish. I dont know whether to eat you or mount

• I'm like a Rubik's Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!

More Dirty Pick Up Lines

• Is your dad a farmer? Because you’ve got some melons.

• I lost my rubber ducky, will you bathe with me instead?

• I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me tonight?

• You’ve got a butt that makes me want to be your wallet!

• Girl, you’re a sex crime waiting to happen.

• Do you like magic? I want to cast a spell on you with my magic meat wand.

• Do you know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie-pop?
Wanna find out?

• I'm an army recruiter. Why don't you come over to my place and "be all you
can be."

• Wanna see a trick I learned in prison?

• Girl, I would love to lick your belly button......from the inside!

• My bed is broken. Can I sleep in yours?

• They call me "coffee". I grind so fine.

• Do you like whales? Cause I have a hump-back at my place.

• That's a nice shirt, it would go great with my floor.

• You must be Jelly, cause jam don't shake like that.

• Don't worry, I don't get emotionally involved. It's just physical.

• I'll make you shiver when I deliver.

• Do you like blueberries or strawberries? (Why?) I want to know what kind of
pancakes to order in the morning.

• Wanna play midget boxing? You get down on your knees and give me a couple

Some More Dirty Pick Up Lines

• If women were trophies, you’d be first place.

• If women were trophies, I’d mount you.

• I may not be the Dairy Queen, but I could treat you right.

• I’ve got skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?

• My magic watch says that you aren’t wearing any underwear. (What! Yes I
am!) Dang, it must be 15 minutes fast!

• I have a snake and he wants to enter your garden.

• If I was an astronaut, my next mission would be Uranus.

• Let’s have breakfast tomorrow. Should I call you or nudge you?

• You turn my software into hardware.

• You turn my floppy disk into a hard drive.

• Do you believe in one night stands?

• Hey baby, if I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?

• I’m a bird watcher and I’m looking for the Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have
you seen one?

• Nice legs, let’s eat out.

• Excuse me miss, I was wondering… Do you wipe front to back or back to front?

• Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants!

• Are you a horse? (No.) Can I ride you anyway?

• Your face or mine?

• I’m bigger and better than the titanic… Only 200 women went down on the

• Is your dad a farmer? Because you’re making my corn grow.

Even More Dirty Pick Up Lines

• What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

• Do you work for UPS? I could’ve sworn I saw you checking out my package.

• Do you work for cingular, cause your raising my bar!

• You must be an army general, because my private just snapped into attention.

• Your body is like an hour glass, and I just want to play in the sand.

• Did you fart? Cause you blow me away.

• I’m gay, think you can convert me?

• I’ll cook you dinner if you cook me breakfast.

• I’ll show you my tan lines if you show me yours.

• I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.

• If you were homework I would do you on the table.

• If a fat man kidnaps you and puts you in a bag at night, don’t worry I told
Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

• Is your father a lumberjack? Because every time I look at you I get wood in
my pants.

• Your eyes are almost as blue as my toilet water.

• You’re so hot you would make the devil sweat.

• Girl you’re like an accident… I just can’t look away.

• Violets are blue, roses are red. What’s it going to take to get you in bed?

• Is your shirt felt? Do you want it to be?

• Do you work at Subway? Cause you just gave me a foot long!

• I’ve been wondering, do your lips taste as good as they look?

Cheesy Pick Up Lines

• Nike took my motto- Just Do It.

• This isn't a beer belly, It'a a fuel tank for a love machine.

• There are a lot of fish in the sea, but you're the only one I'd like to

• Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? (Pull pockets out) Would you
like to?

• Did you know kissing is a language of love? How about a conversation?

• I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Wal-Mart, so I could ride you all day
long for a quarter.

• Bond. James Bond.

• How was heaven when you left it?

• I must be lost. I thought paradise was further south.

• Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel?

• You look like an angel. Welcome to Earth.

• Pinch me. (Why?) You're so fine I must be dreaming.

• Your daddy must be a hunter because he sure caught a fox!

• You must be from Pearl Harbor, because baby, you're the bomb.

• Are you snickers? Because you satisfy me.

• Excuse me, I have an boo boo on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?

• Can I take your picture? (Why?) Because I want Santa to know exactly what I
want for Christmas.

• I'm a Love Pirate, and I'm here for your booty!

• Hey baby. You got a jersey? (What for?) Because I need your name and number,

More Cheesy Pick Up Lines

• Is your dad a baker? Cause those buns are kickin!

• See my friend over there? He wanted me to ask you if you thought I was cute.

• Did the sun just come up or was that just you smiling at me?

• Somebody call the cops, it must be illegal to look that good!

• Do you know CPR? Cause you just took my breath away.

• Is your dad a baker? Cause you’re a cutie pie!

• Is your last name Campbell? Cause you’re mmm mmm good!

• Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?

• (Use thumb to smudge a girl’s cheek) You got a little beautiful on your face.

• Are you a hurricane? Cause you blow me away.

• I must be in heaven because I’m looking at an angel.

• People call me (your name), but you can call me tonight!

• I noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you the notice that I’ve
noticed you too.

• Miss, I’m going to have to report you for stealing that. (What?) My heart.

• So… Do you have a New Year’s Resolution? I’m looking at mine right now.

• Dang, there’s something wrong with my cell phone. (What?) Your number’s not
in it.

• Are you a cop? (No.) Cause your America’s finest.

• Hey there, I didn’t know angels flew so low.

• You must be Jamaican, because your Jamaican me crazy!

• Are you a pokemon? Cause I’d sure like to Pikachu!

• If you were a pokemon, I’d choose you!

Some More Cheesy Pick Up Lines

• Do you know karate? Cause that body is kickin!

• If being beautiful was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged.

• Are you a parking ticket? Cause you’ve got FINE written all over you!

• Has your license been suspended for driving all these men crazy?

• Did you have lucky charms this morning? Cause your looking magically delicious!

• If you were a burger at McDonalds, you’d definitely be McGorgeous.

• Mmm girl, I wish I was a farmer so I could just plant a whole field of yall!

• Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?

• If you were a booger, I’d pick you first.

• Did it hurt? When you fell from heaven.

• Do you have the time? To write down my number.

• I was blinded by your beauty and am going to need your name and number for insurance reasons.

• Can I take a picture of you? So I can show Santa what I want for Christmas.

• Are you from Tennessee? Cause you’re the only ten I see!

• Are you an alien? Because you’ve just abducted my heart.

• Are you an alien? Because there’s nothing else like you on Earth!

• Do you have any raisins? How about a date?

• Do you have a band aid on you? Cause I just scraped my knee falling for you.

• Dang, you’re so beautiful I forgot my pick up line.

• If I had a nickel for every time I saw a girl as beautiful for you, I’d have five cents.